Happy Thanksgiving: With a Little Help from My Friends-an update, updated !

I wrote this last year, and I figured you just can't thank people enough! I wanted to include some
wonderful people that made this year so special, too. And I updated some of the times I shared with the folks I wrote of last year. I am grateful for all they have done for me and my family

With Thanksgiving coming, I’d like to express my gratitude to some folks who have helped me and my family so much in the years. I hope I don’t forget anyone…but when I do, please don’t take offense. As Harold Dorr reminded me once, “Just say you had a senior moment.” In no particular order:

Dr. Frank and Rachel Lopez: Last year in December, Frank and his son Lex stood in the rain to make sure I was the first in line for a ticket to see Bruce Springsteen on Broadway. It worked and I wrote about it in an essay "Seven Rows from Springsteen." This year he and Rachel invited us to stay in their studio apartment in NYC, and that allowed us to visit out son Nicholas and daughter Anna for a full week. Not only that but he treated Pam and I to a Broadway play, not just any play--but the premiere Of Arron Sorkin's "To Kill a Mockingbird." What a gift they gave us. 


Jacky and Martin Cox: We had the great pleasure to meet these two Brits on our train trip on the
Rocky Mountaineer. And what a trip it was. Made so much more wonderful by making a friendship that we will continue this year. I learned what "All the Georgie Best" means. I'll leave it to you to find that out when you meet those rascals from over the pond.

Bob Parkington:  He proved just how tough he is—when a car hits you, you dust yourself off…make sure all the bolts and screws are tightened, and head to Paris ! Along with his loving wife Sandy, who nursed him back to health, they provided the great pictures of France for all of us to enjoy. Viva la France!

Kathy McWilliams: who adopts kids into her family with a huge heart and Mark, my best man, integrity in the dictionary. Their devotion to their boys’ passions is unconditional. This year they have been so determined to shed weight and get in shape that they blew us away when we saw them this summer. Fantastic!
whose picture lies next to the word

Dave Gibbs: My golf partner and the most honest man I know, and Jeanne, his wife. Put together, they are partners in ‘fun.’ This year they helped me write part of my newest novel "Meet Me at Moonlight Beach"

Bob Bjorkquist: The Renaissance man, an adventurer bar none, and his loving road trip partner, Toni. Bob, once again did a masterful job with my newest book cover.

Linda Englund: Proving the old adage that we all have a great ‘Second Act,’ if we have the courage to step into the white, hot spotlight and never, never, never stop learning and growing. This year she was nominated for several "Best Actress" awards and WON at the Escondido Patio Playhouse. 

Chris Saunders: Two years removed from losing his battle with cancer, Chirs never lost his sense of Marsha, his wife of 40 years, embodies ‘grace under fire.’ He was the first person I ran my novel's plot to and he was the first person to introduce me as "his friend, the author..."
humor and humility.  He remains the most famous man I know, but you’d never know it because he was so damn modest; and 

Jim Reifeiss: My younger ‘brother from another mother’ who pushed me to be a writer,… and bought me a ticket to see Springsteen.

Joyce and Bill Daubert: Mother and Father Earth—people you count on when the going gets tough. This year Joyce was the 'reader' for my new novel and her advice and encouragement was essential to me.

Harold Dorr: who rides on the Wild Side, reminding me there is a wild side; it’s just not my wild side.

David and Kathy Fares: A couple who reminds me of the joy of being spontaneous—and gracious. This year I learned what it meant "to get outta the Heights!" Thanks, Dave.

Sandy Gonnerman: Who believes in my writing and implores kids to read.

Tom and Patty McKinney: “Longboards Rule” is an essay I wrote a long time ago about Tom and his family. It spoke of deep appreciation for what people have meant to him and Patti.

Jack and Karen Mosher: The “teenagers” who married, raised a family, and whose love touched so many lives. My Blog about their passing reached 4,500 people. Last week I had a chance to reconnect with his daughter Becky and her husband John. Cut from the same cloth.

Monique LT and Faye Visconti: Two teachers who do not know each other, but both know me. Teachers who hold that kids come first in their classes. Their dedication is uncompromising.

Christa Tiernan, my editor, who makes me look like I know what I’m doing. Michelle Lovi, my book designer from New Zealand, who makes the novel and Kindle look so professional.

Barb ad Gary Charlebois: The ‘gypsy’ travelers who helped us discover Maui. And Barb, who has helped me when there was a “Darkness on the Edge of Town.”

Rudy and Dee Casciato: Who embrace their boys’ passion…besides- they’re Italian…’You got a Ed O’Connor and Mike Parinello and the late, great Tony Goffredo...and of course their wives: Karen, Vinnie and Meg.)
problem with that?’ (I would be remiss to ignore my golf buddies:

Carol and ‘Uncle’ Don Elder: What greater gifts to give than to give your home to your children? And to Tim and Chelsea for being my Moonlight Beach Cover Models!

The Cantone Family: The Fab Five threw a great party for their father, my Uncle Joe--aka the Legend. The farewell to the Man was a tribute he woulda loved. He passed this year.

My family knows exactly what we thank each other for, but sometimes I forget to thank my friends. I know I have left out many folks, please know that I care about you and would be there in a heartbeat.

Bob Pacilio …typing from the Metaphor Café

p.s. and thanks to all my former students and debaters/ speakers who have been so supportive ! I know you know who you are

because you "like" so much stuff I write in my blogs like this one.

Lessons from Casablanca: 75th Anniversary: Still the Same Old Story

I’ve been thinking about my favorite film and how relevant it remains despite its glossy images of a world in turmoil. Here are a few things to remember:

1. “With the coming of the Second World War, many eyes in imprisoned Europe turned hopefully, or desperately, toward the freedom of the Americas. Lisbon became the great embarkation point. But, not everybody could get to Lisbon directly, and so a tortuous, roundabout refugee trail sprang up…” This is the opening narration. The direction of today’s refugees differs only slightly; some who can afford it travel to America, but many first cross the Mediterranean Sea to Italy or Greece from Africa. It is not Hitler’s Nazis they fear. No, it is the fact that the intense climate’s effect on crops and abject poverty or corruption that has them scurrying for help…for freedom. Unfortunately, due to fear many are turned away, even Syrians whose towns have been blown to bits. This is not the America of Casablanca. That is why “Everyone comes to Rick’s”

2. “And what if you track down these men and kill them, what if you killed all of us? From every corner of Europe, hundreds, thousands would rise up to take our places. Even Nazis can't kill that fast.” Victor Laszlo, leader of the resistance, reminds us of the dangers of those who have a singular view of what is a "superior" race. America was reminded of how these white supremacists are still among us in Charlottesville.

3. “I'm the only ‘cause’ I'm interested in.” Rick Blaine argues the case for isolationism. He is selfish and has been burnt in his fight for the underdogs—and his lost love, Ilsa Lund. This is a reminder of what is commonly called “The Zero Sum Game.” In simple terms, anything I give up for another means I lose it for myself. So civil rights, women’s rights, LGBTQ rights—each of these groups that have been disenfranchised in the past now wish to be

included in the America fabric and given equal opportunity. For some, that takes away from their “traditional” power. Instead of growing the pie, they feel that the pie is being sliced away from them; thus, they are "the only cause they are fighting" for. Rick’s mantra: “I stick my neck out for nobody.”

4.  Senor Ferrari: “What do you want for Sam?” Rick: “I don't buy or sell human beings.” Casablanca makes a statement in 1942 about civil rights. Sam, the African American piano player, is not for sale. Sam and Rick’s friendship and mutual respect runs deep. This is another lesson relevant today. Once people of good faith meet, the color of one’s skin should never come between them. Black Lives Matter—Human lives matter. But even in Casablanca, the Nazi General states: “As you have observed human life is cheap here in Casablanca.”

5.” If it's December 1941 in Casablanca, what time is it in New York? …I'd bet they're asleep in New York. I'd bet they're asleep all over America.” Rick Blaine eventually realizes that his “destiny” in the battle of good over evil is shaped by his sacrifices, even losing the love of his life, for a cause bigger than anything he's faced before. he lives in. Are we asleep? Are we not noticing that we as a nation are slipping backward and not progressing forward? President Obama believed that "our best days lie ahead." However, events of this year seem to be pushing us away from the being the beacon of freedom and hope and into a nation of fear and divisiveness. Rick realizes his selfishness and finds strength when he tells Ilsa:

: “I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.”
As the film closes, Rick’s foil Victor Laszlo nods to Rick as he boards to plane to tell America to wake up to the atrocities occurring in Hitler’s Germany: “Welcome back to the fight. I know this time our side will win.”